Posted by: steveonfilm | December 1, 2010

The First Five Matter

Although I just finished another round of polish on Served Cold, I wasn’t ready to put it back in the shelf yet. I’ve been tinkering with the idea of changing the opening of the script to introduce not only Fisher’s team, but Garnier’s team as well, and string it all together with a voice over narrative.

I think it turned out pretty good, for a first run through. I don’t know, let me know what you think?

Served Cold New Open

Until next time, keep writing!
-Steve

[Update: I had a feeling this is too much, and it looks like I’m correct. As Carson over at Scriptshadow pointed out:

“You can’t introduce 10 characters in your first four pages. It’s so important for these pages to flow. They have to hook the reader.”

Point. Set. Match. I know better than this, and tried to do too much in to few pages.]

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